thehauntedfrequency

doggone

[In the time following his departure from Tabito and Manabu's company, the alias "Grey" has wound up sticking.

Not that everyone calls him that, he's used a few other aliases since then, but it's what he's wound up thinking of himself as. If Grey had taken the time to think about it a bit more he might have picked something with a little less connection to Rezo's name, but it's still leagues better than thinking of himself as "Rez- wait, no, just a copy." And maybe that's why he's felt significantly calmer since he left Sairaag.

By his own standards, Grey has been laudably well-behaved; sure, he's been mostly doing under-the-table psychic work, often on behalf of criminals, but! He's been trying to keep a low profile so it's usually things like clairvoyant spying rather than anything violent, and he's been making a point of not doing anything that directly impacts the galaxy railways.

It would be extremely awkward if Manabu Yuuki had to try and arrest him, after all.

He's found himself frequently thinking about Manabu, much to his annoyance. He has no serious expectations of ever seeing Manabu again, so it's simply a waste of mental bandwidth to find himself wondering what Manabu is doing right now or where he is, or to reminisince over their incredibly brief acquaintanceship. Grey can only suppose that because Manabu was the first reasonably normal person he got to know after leaving Sairaag that Manabu is going to stick out in his mind for a while.

And it's probably because of the real estate that Manabu is hogging in Grey's mind that he's been very aware of every mention of the SDF that crosses his path. He hasn't exactly been tracking the SDF's activities deliberately, but he does pay attention to the news and the SDF frequently winds up in there, even if Manabu's name in particular isn't normally dropped.

Until the day it does.

SDF Officer Taken Hostage By Pirates]

* * *

[It's taken several weeks of investigating, but Grey has been able to track down The Huntress's client, a Dr. Parish and associates. It must be a small galaxy, because Dr. Parish is someone Grey knows. Sort of.

Rather, Dr. Parish was a colleague of Rezo's who collaborated with the man on chimera research (and other unsavory things) in the past. Not only that, the man was an ardent admirer of Rezo's superior psychic prowess, and desperate to improve his own meager abilities.

He'd had quite a shock when Grey approached him in town, but after the initial surprise it had been sickeningly easy to convince Dr. Parish that he was the real Rezo. Grey can only surmise that the man wants to believe too badly to let himself be properly suspicious. It had only taken a day for Grey to be invited to tour Parish's laboratory.

The lab's located on the grounds of a former Marquess's estate, a ways out of town and secluded by trees, a high wall, and a long drive. Grey's done a little recon before, but actually being here is different, especially since he has to navigate by cane at the moment. Grey is doing his best to politely nod and smile as Parish guides him from room to room, explaining their work and occasionally handing him things to examine himself.

But evidently Parish realizes that "Rezo" isn't entirely interested, because he stops partway through an explanation of some stem cell experiments he and a few others have been working on to say "Of course, the really interesting specimens are kept in the basement floor."

Grey already knows this. He hopes his expression seems the right sort of eager.]

Interesting?

["Something along the lines of what we did in the past. Would you like to see them?"]

Nothing would please me more.

[Grey can practically hear Parish's delighted grin. To soothe the surge of irritation, Grey reminds himself that he's going to kill this man before the end of the day and allows Parish to guide him out into the hall and to the basement entrance at the back of the building.]

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Hoh-!! [Manabu perks up - ears too.] It’s so dark…is it still wet? C’mere, lemme check it!

[he scoots upright where he’s sat to better inspect.]

Hm? Alright.

[Grey cautiously approaches the bed and crouches so that Manabu can get a better look. He's toweled his hair off pretty thoroughly so it's no longer dripping, but it's definitely still wet and freshly washed.]

[it’s a little awkward with Grey facing him, but Manabu committed… he hesitates, then leans in to peer.]

Can I move some? Like this— [he carefully combs a small length from one side to the other to look at what lay beneath.]

Ehhh…I may have done a good job. Did you notice any missed spots?

[If it helps with the awkwardness any, Grey's eyes do flutter shut when Manabu reaches out to fiddle with his hair.]

Nn. There wasn't anything that I could see- [And he'd spent quite a while looking.] -but it's hard to get a good look at myself.

[Maybe if he says this then Manabu will try to do a more thorough inspection, and Grey will get more pets.]

[well, that’s excuse enough to get a good look!]

Tilt your head down a little. [and he’ll get a better look, do his due diligence…

seems good to him. a darker shade of purple, almost black - black in the right light. different. kind of like the difference between twilight and nightfall…

his fingers were already gentle, but his rhythm is slower after a point, just getting a bit lost in introspection about it.]

[Grey obediently tilts his head and lets Manabu comb through his hair, suppressing an occasional shiver at the light touches and tugs. He wonders how Manabu feels about the color. It shouldn't matter as long as it's functional as a disguise, but he hopes Manabu doesn't dislike it...

He gets a little lost himself, absorbed in the intimacy of the moment. Of the slow stroking of Manabu's fingertips. As it goes on though, he does start to wonder what Manabu is thinking, if he's noticed any missed spots, and why he's being quiet.

Grey shifts his head, finally, looking over at Manabu through half-lidded eyes.]

Manabu...

[the move results in Manabu’s hands framing Grey’s face in a hover, some stray hairs lingering through his fingers.

Manabu looks rather far away, thoughtful and dreamy, blinking slowly before coming back to earth, so to speak.

his face warms.]

It…it looks good.

[Grey can't stop staring at Manabu, his gaze flicking across every nuance of Manabu's expression. It's an unusual look on Manabu's face, but not a bad one.

Grey's heart is pounding so hard he can barely hear what Manabu is actually saying. When comprehension filters in, Grey's almost too lost in Manabu to care- but not entirely, and a little glow of pleasure lights up inside him at the compliment. He murmurs:]

...Does it?

[Grey leans forward, and. Well.

Impulse, for the moment, wins out over prudence. Grey presses a clumsy kiss against Manabu's lips.]

[Manabu Yuuki rarely thinks too hard on wanting to do things - he just does what he wants to do. but usually there's a basis for it to work from - the training, the plans and such...

so how would he think to do something like kiss someone if he's never had the basis for it before outside of a nebulous want?

that aside--]

-?!

[what--

what is--

Manabu goes still, his hands hovering in place, fingers just barely twitching as he's seized by the sudden sensation and all the information that barrages him in the instant. it's a temporary at-a-loss for a circumstance where Manabu has had only a smattering of reference to go on, and that reference was hazy and addled with embarrassment and alcohol.

but as always: thought is secondary to action. the hesitation that the bluescreen causes is a few seconds - maybe horrifyingly apparent and easy to misconstrue - but before there can be any proper recoil one way or the other, Manabu presses in to reinstate those feelings. this is what's causing them, right? and that feeling--

it feels right in a confusing kind of way.]

[While in theory Grey knows what kissing is like, in practice he has never tried it for himself and it probably shows. The press of his lips to Manabu's certainly lacks finesse, a graceless show of affection that borders on childish.

But the rush it gives him, that thrill of yearning and pleasure at being so close to Manabu, feeling Manabu's mouth under his, is entirely real and overwhelming.

Grey doesn't want to stop. Grey wants to keep going, to kiss Manabu further and deeper and do other things that, in his affection-addled state, he can't entirely put a name to. But he doesn't have enough experience to know how to prolong this sort of thing, and he has to stop eventually just to take a breath.]

Ah- Ah...

[With the breath of air comes clarity, the realization of what he's done. I kissed Manabu.

Grey sharply stands up and stumbles back, away from Manabu and the temptation to mindlessly continue.]

...Hell!

[Grey takes another step back, regret starting to filter in properly along with a myriad of thoughts about why that was a horrible mistake. He's an SDF officer. He's a normal person. He froze up when you kissed him (did he kiss you back afterwards?) You're supposed to be protecting him. All true enough, but not helpful now that it's too late to undo what's already been done.

Grey touches his fingertips to his lips and stares down at Manabu, wondering how the hell he's going to explain this.]

[Manabu startles by how suddenly things shifted - the breaking of that lightning-strike moment to something jarringly cold and untethered. he blinks a few times, eyes big, face flush, his head still tilted down in the same position it had been when they'd...

kissed...

he puts a hand over his hammering heart.]

Whoa... [eloquent, as ever.] That... [was unique.]

[It's hard to get a good look at his expression from this angle, but Manabu looks... stunned? Well, of course. Grey had just kissed him out of nowhere. But Manabu had just been so close, and he'd been touching Grey so gently and looking at him like... Like...

Grey swallows and finishes Manabu's thought instead.]

That was a mistake. I know.

[Grey turns away, raking an agitated hand through his hair.]

Just forget about it.

[Let's not unpack why he did it and what it means for the two of them, nope!]

Eh-?

[stomach dropping, his head lifts, big eyes fixing on...well, Grey's back.]

Mistake? Really? [that was a mistake? it was a mistake to feel that?]

[His shoulders hunch a little at the query. Alright, so maybe he'd wanted to kiss Manabu, but he'd still done it without thinking! It wasn't as if he'd been scheming something, or had bad intentions...]

Yes. You were just- too close. I wasn't thinking.

...

[too close.

this feels weird.]

A...ah. I'm sorry. [mistake.] I keep...messing up, huh? [that feeling is a mistake? for Grey, at least. maybe not for him. but that's kind of messed up, isn't it?

why would something feel right for one person, but be wrong for another?]

[Grey feels a genuine pang of physical pain at the remorse in Manabu's words. Making it worse is that he is a little angry with Manabu over it, blaming him for being too close and moreover, too enticing.

As if Manabu would ever deliberately set out to entice Grey.

Grey sighs, still not able to turn around and meet Manabu's gaze.]

We've been very close these past few days, and things have been intense. But this will all come to an end sooner or later, so it's better we don't do anything we'd regret.

[Manabu's head lowers, feeling nauseous in a way he's not used to. heartsick is reserved for grief and loss, not...whatever's going on here, and yet the feeling is similar.]

I should...regret that, then...huh? [how does he make himself do that? maybe if Grey was suffering; his own suffering is negligible by comparison.

he is suffering, right? he can't even look at him.

damn...

why...?]

[A mirthless little laugh escapes Grey.]

Yes, of course you should.

[Grey isn't someone Manabu should be kissing, or doing anything of the sort with- a criminal, a copy, the bastard progeny of a corrupt mad scientist so like the ones that tormented Manabu for months.

Under the circumstances, with Manabu made near-helpless while recovering from surgery, and enemies lurking everywhere else, maybe Manabu might get confused and think of Grey as- as something he's not.

But if the truth ever came to light then Manabu would be revolted with the liberties that Grey's already taken. And if Grey does anything more...]

Just pretend this never happened. Please.

[why?

Manabu's fingers squeeze against his chest, curling into the shirt.

why does that hurt if it makes sense?]

If...if that's what you want. [even if it doesn't make sense.] Okay.

[this will go great with the guy who is chronically too honest for his own good.]

...Right. That's settled then.

[Grey should be more relieved at the agreement. If Manabu forgets it, then maybe they can go back to some sort of safe equilibrium and get out of this unscathed.

He's just a bit afraid that it's too late for that.]

We should get back to work.

[Or something. Something other than standing there in the silent wake of that gentle kiss, and the regret afterwards.]

Work...work on what? [he should be more eager to lean into work, but he feels...gross. uncomfortable. stifled and at a loss. it's a lot all at once! which one is even the real, right feeling to have? why can't he just...turn it off?]

...

[Not more physio, that much is certain. It's going to take some time before Grey can be casual about doing that again.

And God is it going to be awkward when they turn in for the night. They'd just sorted out the issue with Grey's... nocturnal hormones and physical reaction thereof, and now it's as if they're back to square one.

He's such an idiot.]

I think... I'll do more scouting of the university campus. Clairvoyant scouting, and you can keep an ear out for anything I have to report while I'm out there. [Maybe he'll see more license plates, or whatever.

More importantly, it gives him a chance to get out of the atmosphere of the apartment without physically running away.]

...Mn. Alright.

[it's not really Grey leaving, but it also is? it's weird. Manabu tries not to think about it as he feels around for where he left the tablet, still feeling atrocious; the tingling lingers, his face still warm, his heart still racing, his stomach a knot...]

If you can get...staff names. Some glimpse of a time table. That'll help.

I'll do my best.

[With an objective at hand other than convincing Manabu to forget about the kiss, Grey can finally bring himself to turn around and face Manabu. His shoulders are tense, his brow is furrowed- but he's actually able to look at poor Manabu. Mostly.]

Do you remember how this works? I can't see or hear you, so if something goes wrong...

Shake you. [he nods, his eyes downcast, very much the dejected dog tapping onto the notepad application.] I remember.

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